What is it like being a vlogger ?

 I have been vlogging for a few months and I feel like being a vlogger is no longer a dream for me anymore. I love watching youtube videos, and I always wonder, what if I make videos just like them? I know that I cant be a beauty guru, (or maybe I can, it just that I still need some time, to improve my makeup skills), but I know that I can do daily vlogs! So why not start something simple?

When I got my offer letter from Monash to go exchange abroad, my first instinct was, it's time for me to start vlogging! It is not a hard thing to learn how to vlog, or edit video. What is real hard is to start it. I always don't have the chance to start vlogging. I can't find the reason to start.

But now, I find one. MEMORY.

That is what I want to keep.

If you ask me, what is it like being a vlogger, this is what I will tell you :)

You will have to bear with the strangers' stares. Not one or two person, but a street of people,
if you're vlogging outside.

At first, I felt super uncomfortable to vlog infront of people. I feel like they are giving me the look, that is telling me that I am a weird person. I feel like people are mocking at me, when I heard someone's laughing. But then I asked myself not to perasan. :)

 I always vlog like I am the only one in the world. It is not like I am trying to be arrogant or anti-social, but to be self confident. Do things that what you think is right and don't mind what people thought of you. Yup, that's my trick :)

I sometimes find it awkward to speak infront of the camera, because I am too conscious of my surrounding. Like what I have mentioned in my first point, I am not used to people looking at me.

I am socially awkward. I find it hard to start a convo with new people. I want to be a socialized person, but when it comes to a new surrounding or with new people, my brain just can't function.

When I can't social with people, how am I going to "social" with my camera?

I find it weird when some youtubers said that they're socially awkward, but still can talk so much in their videos. o.o

I feel awkward when I have nothing to say, and this kind of awkwardness lead to my third point.

I see a lot of flaws through my own video. I am not good enough. I am not perfect.

I have limited vocabulary, and that is why I always say the same thing.

It is easy to see your flaws from the third point of view. Rather than letting people say how imperfect you are, how many flaws you have, it is better to find it out yourself and change to make a better you.

 I love sharing stuff, but I am not confident enough. I am scared of judgement, that's why I don't share it out in my other social media, where most of my friends are.

Some of my friends don't even that this blog even existed.
This is how low key (unconfident) I am.

Since I have started vlogging, I am a bit reluctant to my dayre. I did update it once in a while, but most of my post are no longer that long anymore. Because I vlog everyday, I have limited time, and I always use my free time to edit video, instead of updating my dayre.

Vlogging is really one of the best choice to make the moment "stop" there. We can always rewind to the days, and enjoy the moments. Like what I always said memories might fade, but videos won't, because I have bad memories :P

One day, I would like to look back at my videos, and watch it like watching a drama, laughing at my own childishness and the young me. 

I find that editing video is the most interesting thing that is happening in my life right now. It is a small getaways for me from all my works and studies.

Besides having fun, creating memories with friends, I got to record them and share it with my family (my best supporters). My friends (not many of them) always said that my videos are entertaining, and I am not sure whether it is a good thing or no. Are they making fun of me? Oh well, I don't know. They always laugh at my video and said that I am funny o.o